Wouldn’t it be great if the latest fashions were modest and television promoted honorable themes and movie stars were good role models? It is hard to imagine, isn’t it? Our culture is far from a wholesome place for our teen daughters. One of the most serious challenges teens face is a myth that permeates our culture. It claims that a worldly woman is strong and secure while a pure woman is naïve and vulnerable.The movie, The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants, gives us an example of how this message is delivered to teen girls. In this made-for-teens movie, four friends find adventure during their summer break. Lena, the most insecure of the four girls, goes to Greece to spend the summer with her grandparents. While there, she has her first affair with a young man. At the end of the movie when her three friends meet her at the airport, they immediately notice her new found confidence. They smile as if they know why and give their approval.
The message sent by this movie is not an accident. The following is the character biography for Lena from www.imdb.com:
Lena is a shy, beautiful girl. She has always been the most cautious, and conservative of the 4 girls. She, though, fell in love with Kostos on her first trip to Greece. The first summer without her girls by her side, she learns that she needs to follow her heart, and she'll end up happier than before.
In the sequel, The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2, we find out that Lena’s happiness was short-lived. Kostos did not want the same thing she wanted from the relationship and it broke her heart. The solution in the sequel was to go back to Greece and have a second sexual encounter with Kostos, who is still saying he cannot give her anything more. Really? That’s the wisdom they came up with - - give yourself again to the man who avoids you and then pretend you are happy!? I want to shout, “No, that’s not the answer to your broken heart! That will only make you more insecure.”
This movie theme is subtle, but it still sends a strong message to a young girl who is searching for more security or happiness in her life. Teens hear messages like this in different forms from all directions: WORLDLINESS MAKES YOU STRONG! But as I said, it really is a myth. A better word to describe a worldly woman is hardened, not strong. Sin hardens our heart; it never makes us stronger. We can see the truth of this in teens. Over the last two decades, statistics show a dramatic increase in sexually transmitted diseases, eating disorders, abortions, depression and suicide among teens. Teens have more opportunities to experience the world than ever before, but it has not made them stronger.
.jpg)
Our teens face crucial challenges, but we are not powerless in equipping them to open their eyes to the truth about impurity and its devastating nature. I would like to share with you a mom’s guide that I have written for the book, Pursuing Purity and Spiritual Beauty. You can download this free 22-page guide from my website and use it to study this book with your daughter. It includes fun activities, discussion questions and assignments that you and your daughter can do together.
You can study this book alone with your daughter or form a “Pure Beauty” group and invite other moms and teen daughters to join you. The ideal group size is 6-10 people; however, if you are using this guide for a larger group, you will find suggestions on how to adjust some of the activities. This “Mother/Daughter Group Study Guide” is available on my website www.SilverdayPress.com under “Free Resources”.
