Hello again. It is I – Simon the Sorcerer. You last saw me displaying my powers during Upside Down this summer in St. Louis.
No doubt you enjoyed my display of my magnificence, my power, and my glory and majesty during my stunning visual performance – ahem (cough) – accompanied of course by the minor subplot about your Jesus, turning the world upside down. And I should imagine that for the last several months, you have been dreaming about me, and wishing you could see more of me, as often as you wish.
So I began to feel sorry for you.
To resolve your sorrow, and demonstrate my great beneficence, I have spoken with those poor, pitiful creatures at Upside Down Ministries – the ones who put on the show.
On Monday, November 28, I have arranged through my magical powers to provide you the ability to pre-order, at a special pre-release price, the newly released Upside Down 2016, available on DVD or Digital Download. Stay tuned...you will be getting a mystical message from me no later than Monday with a special pre-release coupon code.