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About five years ago, many of us were deeply affected by the crisis in the International Churches of Christ. Most of us had devoted our lives to the efforts of the church to bring a special message to a lost and dying world. When the internal structure of our fellowship collapsed, many were left with a profound sense of loss, some even with feelings of betrayal.
In the aftermath of this occurrence, I found myself pondering where to go with my spiritual life. As I spoke with my brothers and sisters in the Lord, I saw four different pathways beckoning to each one of us. In my observation of the various pathways, I found a fifth, less-traveled option—and in the process a sense of spiritual peace and purpose.
The first pathway that some brothers and sisters have chosen is the pathway of bitterness and anger over past hurts. Five years later, many are still stuck in a lethargic depression which saps any spiritual vitality they may have. While I had been hurt as well, I realized that down this pathway, nothing good lay. Even the world knows that stewing in resentment over past hurts only damages us, and does absolutely nothing to correct anything in our characters. Nor does it somehow “punish” those who hurt us. Without judging those who are still in pain, I realized that this pathway was not for me.
Secondly, the long, broad pathway of worldliness and selfish ambition beckoned. Many have chosen this direction. I have observed that almost all who elected to return to the sinful paths of the world are suffering the pain which inevitably comes from turning away from God. Hopefully we realize that the world has no answers for us. It never has, and never will. Ecclesiastes is still as true as it ever was.
Thirdly, some began to call for a return of “the good old days” in which everyone was (supposedly) “totally sold-out.” One thing that I learned from my experiences in the International Churches of Christ was that, while we often talked about being a “sold-out” fellowship, the fact was that many of us were steeped in sin up to our eyeballs—but became good at hiding it. To go with the flow, however, we learned to shout “Amen” loudly on Sundays and go along with whatever we were told to do. In so doing, we could avoid recriminations and being labeled as “uncommitted” or “not a team player.” This model of spiritual overachievement has been tried and found wanting. I refuse to sacrifice my or my family's spiritual well-being on the basis of a man-made goal, however idealistic. What good is it for a man to gain the whole world in his lifetime and yet lose or forfeit his very being? If someone chooses this pathway, that is their choice, but they shall reap the consequences.
Fourthly, I saw the pathway of the denominational world. Some brothers and sisters found some of the messages being taught in Christendom today to have tremendous meaning—and, in fact, many do. I think it would be foolish to ignore wisdom, whatever the source. Some of our members have chosen to join or rejoin denominational churches. Some for good reasons, others with motivations that are less than noble. Whatever the reason, I hope and pray that they are able to serve the Lord in whatever place they happen to choose. I wish them well.
For me, however, I took time to evaluate my church situation. I realized that I was still surrounded by some fantastic disciples who were just as committed to the Lord as they ever were. They wanted to see people saved. They wanted to make a difference in their community. They were still dedicated to sacrificial giving. They still wanted to support mission work. They were dedicated to growing in God. In a very real sense, nothing really changed. True, some of the outward forms of our participation changed in that we had to rely on ourselves in ways that we had not had to before. The happy result was, various members rose to the occasion in ways that they would not have done otherwise. Those gifted with leadership were now able to step into roles that they were previously denied under the old structure. While certain strictures that kept people in the fellowship somewhat artificially were removed (which caused some to leave), those same strictures allowed people to rise up and serve God in new and different ways. If we need assistance from other churches that have greater resources, we have found them to be just as willing as ever to help us.
I chose to follow a new pathway. This was the pathway of service to God right where I was. I spent much time in prayer and decided that I would give myself completely, totally, and unreservedly to the congregation in which the Lord currently has me. I can say with absolute certainty that I am happier now in my service to the Lord, and I am accomplishing more, than at any other time in my walk with God. This includes my first few months as a disciple of Jesus. Our congregation has initiated contact with other congregations nearby. We have held joint services and are looking to expand our relationships with our sister churches. When I'm singing in the sweet fellowship of my brothers and sisters from other congregations, I still feel the same feeling of being part of something larger than my home congregation. This feeling is as true as ever; it is only the outward structure that has changed, not the inner heart.
For those of you contemplating which direction you wish to go in your life I would ask you to consider the pathway I have chosen. I can truly say that today I am a happy disciple of Jesus Christ.
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Dave Owens was baptized into Christ in early 1990. He and his wife Jackie (formerly a member of the mission team that planted the Los Angeles Church) lead the Chemical Recovery Ministry of the Antelope Valley Church. They also operate a Farmers Insurance agency in Lancaster.